Sunday, September 22, 2013

Sweet Dreams


Yay, Fall! I mean like hooray, accessories, but HOLY SHIT I am QUAKING with coldness. Like the kind of shivering that accompanies finding a dead body and maybe recognizing said body. Like the body is that of a mom that you used to see at home school functions who used to talk about her husband's "anger issues". She used to talk about him throwing things around the house, "A dish thrower." she used to say. Often accompanied by nervous laughter.

I will power through this though. Even with the fingers a-jitterin' on the keyboard. Hmmm... I think it's time for some hot toddies? Cold beers are certainly not helping.


O.k., so I have been having CRAZY dreams. And I sleep like the dead. And I never remember dreams. But I have had TWO fucked-up dreams that I can't be rid of. Have I mentioned that I never remember dreams? Seriously, I never remember dreams.


The first features a kid from my high school in his grown-up, Facebook-friends version who, in my dream, died of AIDS. Do I ever think about this person? I do not. Do I have any idea why he would show up in a dream? I do not. 


I fully expected to wake up and see that on Facebook so-and-so died. That he fought the good fight and was brave right up to the end. That he kept his sickness secret because he didn't want false sympathy while he went about reconnecting with his old friends.


But I went on Facebook to see that he commented today on a mutual friend's post about the recent Bengal's game. For sure not dead. And I would have to guess by his zealous nature, not sick.


SOOOOO... I went on-line to interpret this bit of nonsense.


To dream that someone else has AIDS signifies your need to be more compassionate and sympathetic to others. 


Oh, I'm sure that's it. Because working every weekday with adults with disabilities isn't enough. WHO ARE YOU??? Who is this person I need to be more compassionate towards??? Just tell me. Tell me.

"Sharon, it's just an on-line dream interpretation resource. It may mean nothing."

"Oh, fuck you, voice in my head. Read on..."

And then I dreamed ALL NIGHT LONG LIKE I COULDN'T WAKE UP TO THINK OF HOT VAMPIRES OR CHILDREN'S BOOKS OR PURSES, I just dreamed all night long that I had a baby. Oh dear, sweet-baby-Jesus. And not just a regular baby. It was like a random, very thin baby that just showed up off and on and I was holding it. And I didn't have any supplies for it. Like I was at the airport (or maybe the hospital?) and I really needed to get somewhere, but I didn't have a car seat. I didn't even have a diaper. The baby was very limp. I thought it was dead, but it was actually just very chill. At some point I tried to breast feed it because I felt guilty about having nothing else for it. It seemed pretty happy though. It didn't seem upset that I'd forgotten about it.

Fuuuuuuhhhhhhhk!

I immediately woke up feeling like an AWFUL parent. I was absolutely sure that this meant that I was a failure. My children were starving for some something, and I was too inattentive to notice. But they were o.k. with everything. Because they were fucking used to it. That's what I thought this dream meant. 

Well, according to the dream people, this is the verdict..

If you dream that you forgot you had a baby, then it suggests that you are trying hide your own vulnerabilities; you do not want to let others know of your weaknesses. Alternatively, forgetting about a baby represents an aspect of yourself that you have abandoned or put aside due to life's changing circumstances. To dream about a starving baby represents your dependence on others. You are experiencing some deficiency in your life that needs immediate attention and gratification.   

She-yewwwww! I'm not a fucked-up parent! I'm just like YOU! As long as you're a slightly co-dependent, overworked, creative type. Yeah, just like you. 

Samesies! 

So maybe I'll be thinking about YOU tonight, my shitty friend. 

Except that if I DO, it means that my teeth are about to fall out. I'm pretty sure that's it. OR that we both have cancer. 


7 comments:

  1. heheeee, I often have dreams about having a weird shaped baby, and forgetting her/him, and even more regularly forgetting what I named it!

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    1. OMG, Carol... I could spend all day on this site...

      http://www.dreammoods.com/

      It will tell you all kinds of effed up stuff! At least it made me feel better. It's amazing what the results of dreaming about seemingly concrete things actually mean. If we choose to believe what they say.

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    2. oooh, thanks! (I think!) - I'll be sucked in now for hours.

      It's interesting to see what pops up, over and over, in your dreams. For instance, whenever I'm really stressed, streetscapes look like something from Dr. Caligari.

      I used to often dream about two moons in the sky. So since I am a lucid dreamer at times, and was told by someone that if you can ask the item in your dream what it means, sometimes it will respond. So in this dream, I'm walking w/friends through a little wooded area, and I see two moons in the sky, and I look up at the moons in the sky and say "what do you mean?" and my friends in my dream start laughing at me, saying "what the hell are you doing!?" hahaaa

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  2. I used to have a dream dictionary and would look at it for everything, but the moral of the dream was always the same.....you have shitty friends. WTF is a teenage girl supposed to do with that?

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    1. Well, if you're a teenager then chances are that everything does indeed point to having shitty friends. What to do? The best option is to be patient and eventually graduate into "the real world" where you have a greater chance at surrounding yourself with better friends. Not a guarantee though.

      Good luck!

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  3. I'm like you... I rarely remember my dreams. I *used* to remember them, years ago, but not these days. Just last week, I woke from one, thought to myself "that was niftysweetcool, I gotta remember it"...when I woke back up.... Nada. Completely gone. Except my recollection that I needed to remember it.

    Cheers to shitty friends!

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  4. I rarely remember dreams, but there have been times when I have a hard time waking up, and am haunted all day by a dream that I can't remember. I move through my work day under a spell. Usually shake it by lunch time. (Then I get to wondering-- what if this "awake life" is just a dream?)
    (There was a very interesting animated movie---oh, about 10 years ago, called "Waking Life")

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