Sunday, August 4, 2013

Die Trying?

Let's get right down to it. How's your list going? Your bucket list? I've been thinking a lot about THIS post and feeling like a complete schmuck. I've done little to nothing about checking off the big "to do's" It's been over a year. I have no excuses. I am a failure.

Have you learned how to work ANY type of movie camera then edit such an amount of video? Shit, Sharon, even babies know how to do that now! Like everyone in your household knows how to do that. What the fuck have you been doing that you can't eek out an hour to learn how to do that in over a YEAR? Is this REALLY important to you? Is this REALLY something you've wanted to do your whole life? You have a really shitty way of showing it. Bucket list? Maybe fuck-it list is more like it.

OMG, Universe!!! I've had so much shit to do. Won't you please back off?

What "shit to do?" You've had NORMAL amounts of shit to do. You have NO excuse for not learning how to edit a fucking video. You have two... TWO video cameras in your house. You have TWO people close to you who have edited and uploaded fairly quality videos. These people will teach you for free. You do not have to sign up for a class. You do not have to drive to a location. They live with you.

You're right, Universe... I cannot cross over to that other plane of existence until I make a small film. I feel it's in "the contract".  I will put it on my calendar. I will make sure the camera is charged. I will make sure there is ample room on my computer's hard drive (whatever that is). I will make a contract with my readers. I will say that by the end of October I will upload a small, edited film to YouTube.

It might not be great.

But then I can die. Or die trying.


  1. This vow has been noted and recorded.

  2. I don't have a bucket list, like I don't make New Year's resolutions anymore. I'm held accountable enough by other people.. I SPOIL myself. I have things i enjoy doing--so I do them. When I want to. I would like to publish a book some day (still) and would like to create some distinctive art. I feel like I have to free myself somehow of other people's influences and find my own real voice, so I think about that.( Necessitates PLAYING, MORE, I think,) My big goal is to buy a small ranch style house (one floor plan--I'm 60, so thinking ahead) with an attached garage, closer to a metro area where I can work either one good job or a couple part-time jobs and get stinking credit cards paid off, eat good food and have enough $$ for me and cats to eat well and be healthy.
    Then, you did it again--another mysterious disappearing post. I like to talk about reading! I LOVE reading! I read so much my eyes get tired before my body does. I mostly read for entertainment, but I do love to read for information,too, Google and Wikipedia are my playgrounds! I like short stories; I like mysteries. My favorite characters are all the women I'd like to be--smart, tough, curious about people and their worlds. Hard-working, and it pays off for them.I just finished a series by Jacqueline Winspear about a woman named Maisie Dobbs, set in England of 1920's-1940's. I purposely slowed down reading the last book trying to make it last. I hope there'll be more. When I find an author I like. I read EVERYTHING by them. There are lots of great women authors. oh, there are guys I like, too--I loved all Larry McMurtry's early stuff, and lots of Stephen King ( his book "On Writing" is so great.) I liked Paul Auster, and JD Salinger and Kurt Vonnegut are patron saints of mine.(just to mention a few) So much wonderful writing out there. I like art books too. I like to see what other people do with their collections.
    I'm playing at Altered Books. Purposely keeping the pressure at bay--they aren't my Work, they're my PLAY. My Playbooks. I am a huge junk collector, and am trying to cycle all of it, somehow, into this. I don't tell too many people about them--for instance my sisters asked "But what are they FOR?". A cousin said "What will you DO with them? "Hey! They keep me off the streets, OK? And you have to have SOME place to keep pertinent horoscopes, pieces of rusty metal AND sew beads on" So there you have it. I'd like to know why and what you read. And IKNOW I'm going to die someday, but I sure hope I don't die TRYING. I hope I can smile and say "AAAAAHHHHHH"----THAT was FUN!" and THEN kick it.

    1. Mary Jo, you are so inspirational! I love your outlook on everything. I need to hang around more optimists!!!

      I do the samesies. I latch on to a writer then read everything by them. That being said, I've not read everything by all of my favorites as some are very prolific. I love Stephen King too. I also love Neil Gaiman, Harlan Ellison, Clive Barker, and Chuck Palahniuk. Not always uplifting reading, but very entertaining for someone bent toward the dark. I generally will read most anything sci-fi or fantasy related and have loved many books by many authors. I can usually tell if I want to finish a book by the first few pages, so I start but do not finish a lot of stuff.

      My friend Judah who posted just before you did has a great blog and reads TONS more than I do. He often has book reviews on his blog, and I've loved everything he's loved. I would recommend reading his stuff too.

      I love that you check in!!! I'll look into the books you recommended!!! KEEP MAKING ART THINGS!!! You do NOT have to have "plans" for the things you create. The creation is what's important!!!

      Keep being awesome!!! Love you!!!

  3. You are TOO kind! I had to say, so funny that you think I'm an optimist! "LOL", as the kids say!
    I like Chuck Palahniuk and Neil Gaiman, too(remembering your fan rave!). Like you, I can tell by the 1st few pages whether or not I'll finish a book. I used to buy a lot more books; these days I use my Logan library A LOT. Though I have many dear favorite books, I don't go back and re-read much, because there's SO MUCH still waiting to be read. I used to joke about hyperventilating when i walked into a library or bookstore because all the books started whispering "Read me! Pick me!Read me!" and I'd break into a sweat and almost cry--"I CAN'T READ YOU ALL!!" I'll check out your friend's site, too. Thank you--you're awesome too!

  4. DEWD! Let's for real set a movie-making date


  5. There you go! The Buddy System!^^